Posted by jankern on September 9, 2009
![021521609LIVEFREEjourney443[1]](http://jankern.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/021521609livefreejourney44311.jpg?w=161&h=222 "021521609LIVEFREEjourney443[1]")
Just released this month is a new Live Free resource–a small group study for teens/young adults.
LIVE FREE JOURNEY–SMALL GROUP STUDY
Summary from Standard’s July-October 2009 catalog:
Live Free Journey : Small Group Study, the first of the new series of Live Free resources, will help create a safe place for teens to work through their struggles together. It sets up a vibrant discussion base for students to discover, in a deeply personal way, what Jesus meant when he said, “If the Son sets you free, you are truly free” (John 8:36 NLT).
This small group study is for any church, any group. Not only can it be a study used in a small group setting for those who are deeply struggling, it is also a great way to get the dialogue going with your youth about the tough topics teens and young adults face today. It’s a resource and small group study that is easy to incorporate into your existing plans and programs.
More information: product image and description
Available now through ChristianBook.com or Amazon (or contact Standard Publishing)
Posted in Bible study, relationship with God, small group, teens/ya, young adults, youth ministry, youth pastors, youth workers | Tagged: live free, teen topics and issues, youth group resource | Leave a Comment »
Posted by jankern on August 6, 2009
Recently I had a conversation with a parent of a young adult who is now out of the house, has chosen not to live according to his parents’ faith values, and who is in a new relationship. The father said, “I just told my son to be sure he was having protected sex.”
He felt powerless to challenge anything different.
So I want to stir up some good discussion here.
Watch Oprah’s show on Friday, on August 7th, 14 Years Old: They Say They’re Ready to Have Sex, a rerun, and you’ll quickly pick up a sense of the culture’s prevailing attitude about teen sex.
Related links on Oprah’s site:
Having the Sex Talk with Your Kids
Middle School Girls Talk About Sex
Contrast that with another discussion through Christianity Today’s August, 2009 article “The Case for Early Marriages.”
In this piece, Mark Regnerus says that abstinence pledges and courtship training may have left out teaching “young Christians how to tie the knot.” While some of his conclusions in his presented case for early marriages may or may not be the ultimate or only way to go, he brings up some interesting ideas to consider. (If you subscribe to the magazine, you can also read the three responses to Regenerus’s position, which add more interesting thoughts to the discussion.)
Read it all. Consider it.
Instead of feeling powerless as pastors, mentors, or parents of teens (or ignoring addressing the topic altogether), what can we do? What would help our children, teens, and young adults move in the healthiest way toward marriage with a God-honoring respect for the gift of sex and toward great relationships in marriage?
Please share your thoughts. But before you slap down a reaction, really consider the whole picture. I’ll be upfront and admit that this discussion is primarily targeted to those who have generally held to a faith-based perspective. What do you think God is calling us to? And how can we best help our youth get there?
And what advice would you have for the father I mentioned at the beginning? Is there an age when a parent should stop having influence on his child’s, albeit adult child’s, decisions about sex, relationships, and marriage?
Weigh in.
Posted in parents, sex, teen sexuality, teens, youth pastors | Tagged: Christian perspective, culture, mentors, parents, sex, teens, youth pastors | 5 Comments »
Posted by jankern on July 22, 2009
A safe place. Somewhere to talk about the tough issues—the real issues. To test and see if it’s okay to ask the questions, to tell someone what’s been going on inside . . . maybe for the first time.
Today I spoke to a twenty-something-year-old reflecting on her teen years. She recalled what a difference it made when a youth leader finally began talking honestly about topics that hit her and others where it mattered. Other leaders and teachers were nice, helped her feel accepted and welcomed, but none went deep. And that’s what she craved.
Small group tips:
Avoid fill-in-the-blank studies. Look for a study designed to engage group members and encourage them to interact with the material, with the issues, with each other, and—most of all—with God.
Focus less on telling and more on asking great questions to encourage thinking, discussion, and deep sharing. Be purposeful about moving questions and discussion toward personal action and real hope that works in life.
Allow time for deepening personal awareness of what God is doing in their lives and who he is inviting them to become. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in Bible study, small group, teens, young adults | Tagged: deepening awareness of God, engaging groups, small group study, teens, youth leaders | 2 Comments »
Posted by jankern on July 9, 2009
The second book in the Live Free series has received a finalist nomination for the Christian Retailers Choice Awards in the Youth/Teen category. Winners will be announced this coming Monday, July 13, during the International Christian Retail Show (ICRS) in Denver.
An excerpt from the press release:
CINCINNATI – July 1, 2009 – Standard Publishing is pleased to recognize its two finalist nominations for the 2009 Retailers Choice Awards, which will be announced Monday, July 13, during the International Christian Retail Show (ICRS) in Denver. Author Jan Kern’s book Seduced by Sex: Saved by Love (2008), from Kern’s “Live Free” series, was nominated in the Youth/Teen category . . .
Seduced by Sex: Saved by Love, the second in the “Live Free” series for young adults, deals with sexual promiscuity. In each book in the series, Kern tells us the true account of a Christian teenager dealing with a serious problem or addiction. The story unfolds in chapters that read like a novel, interspersed with chapters offering wise counsel and help for struggling teens and those who love them.
In Seduced by Sex: Saved by Love, Kern introduces us to Suzy, who gave herself sexually to her first boyfriend, then lived increasingly promiscuously seeking popularity and acceptance until she nearly lost her life as she spiraled into despair.
This is the second honor for Kern, whose first book in the “Live Free” series, Scars that Wound: Scars that Heal (2007), about self-injury, was nominated in 2008 for Book of the Year by the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association. The third book in the series, Eyes Online: Eyes on Life (2008) is about Internet addictions.
Posted in hope, teen sexuality, teens, young adults, youth ministry | Leave a Comment »
Posted by jankern on April 20, 2009
Take an American girl who has lived outside of the U.S. for a few years, reintroduce her back into this culture, and what you’ll get is an enlightening perspective of the crazy road we might be traveling down. Meredith Whitmore is a new writer for Plugged In Online. She wrote a three-part article—lengthy, but well-worth the reading—about what she has observed since returning to the U.S.
As you read her article, you might feel uncomfortable, even defensive at times—loyal to your country and the culture (U.S.) you’ve grown to enjoy. But hang in there to the end. You’ll chuckle. You’ll gasp. You’ll begin to see she could be on target. You might find yourself considering what you’ve bought into and didn’t need to . . . and the beginnings of a longing to once again enjoy simplicity, conversation, and realness.
She begins with:
I used to think I was a reasonably well-adjusted person. But then I had to move back to the United States.
Donning U.S. culture again felt like wearing a sweater that’s four sizes too small: I stuck out of it. I squirmed to make it fit. I felt beyond absurd. Different aspects of American life that had once felt normal now felt uncomfortable and—dare I say it—horrifying.
‘Culture Shock’ series, Plugged In Online, Meredith Whitmore
Take time to read. Understand her “shock.”
Posted in family, technology, youth ministry | Tagged: family, family ministry, technology, youth | 2 Comments »
Posted by jankern on April 10, 2009
Good Friday. It isn’t called that everywhere. Those in Germany call it Karfreitag, meaning Mourning Friday. Not surprising. God’s hand was raised against the darkness of sin that day long ago when Jesus was led to the cross. And it became a grievious day of loss for those who loved their friend and servant-master and did not yet understand this act of love as Immanuel–God in the flesh giving his life for us.
But that’s also when it becomes Good Friday as we realize that torturuous death was love’s redemption. We who were created in God’s image, created to be in relationship with him, could know the restoration of deep connection and intimacy with him.
I wrote about that day in Scars that Wound, Scars That Heal–A Journey Out of Self-Injury:
Jesus had come to earth to put on human skin to live, breathe, feel, and hurt like you and I do. He had crazy expectations thrown at him. He was spat on, misrepresented, and betrayed—sometimes by those he was closest to.
He then endured humiliation and whippings, a crown of thorns pressed onto his head, a heavy cross placed on his shoulders, and nails hammered into his wrists and feet. So many wounds you couldn’t count them. But each welt, gash, and bruise on Jesus’ body shouts ‘I love you’ and, if accepted, is a gift of freedom and healing.
Only Jesus, as God come to earth, had the power to bear scars that have the ability to reach deep into the hearts of people and heal the hidden pain they feel inside. That’s why another cut or another burn or another punch to the wall isn’t enough. ‘Another’ is never enough. But the wounds Jesus bore are. As he took his last breath on the cross, he said, ‘It is finished’ (John 19:30). Wrapped up in those words is the power of his wounds—Jesus’ completion of God’s plan to set right each person’s messed-up relationship with him and to make it possible for them to experience the depth of his love.
Scars That Wound, Scars That Heal–A Journey Out of Self-Injury, p. 117
Though you may not self-injure, you may be well acquainted with your own hidden pain. Over the next days, it will be my prayer that you will experience the ‘good’ of this weekend of celebration, the power of Jesus’ wounds, the depth of his love.
Posted in hope, relationship with God, self-injury | Tagged: Easter, Good Friday, hidden pain, hope, Jesus, redemption, restoration, self-injury | 4 Comments »
Posted by jankern on March 28, 2009
What do you do when someone tells you they are self-injuring?
Most just want you to be there to listen, but realize that more often than not, they may share their story gradually. They’ll test the waters, see if they can trust you, but also if they can trust themselves to handle telling the story. Doing so may be difficult, painful, or shameful for them. For some, the anxiety they feel while even speaking about their struggle could trigger the compulsion to self-injure again.
More tips . . . Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in self-injury, teens, youth ministry | Tagged: helping teens, self-injury, youth ministry | 3 Comments »
Posted by jankern on March 27, 2009
Yesterday I spoke in a Youth Counseling class at William Jessup University. Part of what we talked about included the trends of self-injury and how those involved in youth organizations and ministries can best be aware of and help a teen who self-injures.
The class asked how you know someone is engaged in self-harming behavior. Typical signs might be the presence of frequent injuries, covering up with long sleeves and pants, multiple scars. You may notice a depressive mood. But self-injury is often secretive. It can even be hidden behind smiles and a life that seems, on the outside, to be going well. How do you widen your awareness? Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in mentoring, self-injury, teens, youth ministry | Tagged: helping teens, self-injury, youth ministry | 1 Comment »
Posted by jankern on March 23, 2009
To offer hope to the hurting teen takes deep commitment, starting with what we do to be certain we have hope to give, the hope they need most.
1 Peter 3:15 says: “But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” (NIV).
An invitation to give real hope is tucked into that verse. It’s not just about logically being able to talk about who Jesus is and his gospel of salvation. There’s another layer that is just as important . . . Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in family, hope, mentoring, teens, youth ministry | Tagged: hope, hurting and addicted teens, teens | Leave a Comment »
Posted by jankern on January 8, 2009
Just back from the Children’s Pastor’s Conference (INCM) that took place in Nashville, Tennessee. Patrick Snow (from SuperStart), Sean Sweet, and I did a preconference on preteen ministry, with my focus being, not surprisingly, the at-risk child or preteen. I was also able to give an additional workshop during the conference. I’ll be doing it again at CPC’s February conference in San Diego.
A few thoughts I shared during my workshops:
The stats we see for junior high/high school at-risk behavior are representative of life challenges that are likely already happening during the childhood/preteen years. To make an impact, we should act now, not later.
Our work and ministry to children and youth is most effective when we keep a pulse on the issues of today’s world and teen culture, especially in consideration of the individual and his or her personal questions and struggles.
Reaching the child, preteen, teen, or young adult involves caring about their family. We do that, at least partly, by developing a ministry philosophy that actively and practically nurtures the respect and communication between the members of the family, and nourishes the faith in that home.
In order to offer real purpose and hope to those we teach in our ministries or love in our homes and communities, we must daily go deeper in our relationship with Christ through prayer, reading God’s words, and intentionally living out what he shows us.
More to come, but I invite your thoughts. Let’s keep the dialog going.
Posted in teens, teens/ya, youth ministry, youth workers | Tagged: at-risk teens, deeper with God, faith in action, family ministry, make a difference, teen culture, tween ministry, youth ministry awareness | Leave a Comment »
or your local bookstore.
![021521609LIVEFREEjourney443[1]](http://jankern.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/021521609livefreejourney44311.jpg "021521609LIVEFREEjourney443[1]")
Just released this month is a new Live Free resource–a small group study for teens/young adults.
